Dealing with Sorrow/Pain

As mentioned in a reminder a couple of weeks ago, we are all in this temporary life to be tested. Our life is full of ups and downs and it’s the dips that sometimes can result in feelings of sorrow or pain.

Firstly, it is worth mentioning that these feelings are not anything to hide or be embarrassed of. We recall accounts of the best of creation and at times these emotions and feelings were experienced by the Prophet SAWS.

From the passing of his first wife to times of uncertainty when revelation stopped coming to the Prophet SAWS, he also had experienced the emotions that we speak of in todays reminder.

However, it’s worth noting that there is a divine wisdom in knowing the life of the Prophet SAWS as the methods to cope with sorrow or pain were either demonstrated or taught to us so that we can benefit from them.

But before we speak of them, it’s worth remembering that this life isn’t Jannat for the believers. By being Muslim and being of the Ummah of the Prophet SAWS and following the truth, that does not entitle us to a life without any sadness or pain.

That is promised to us when we return to our Lord and when we are granted Jannat insha’Allah and so it’s important to keep that point in our hearts and minds.

And so this reminder outlines some of these points so that when we are next facing moments of sorrow or pain, we can take some guidance and alleviate our situation.

  1. To do good deeds. The imam mentioned the 97th ayat of Sura An-Nahl in reference to this point and it is translated to say:

Whoever works righteousness, man or woman, and has Faith, verily, to him will We give a new Life, a life that is good and pure and We will bestow on such their reward according to the best of their actions.

Dear brothers and sisters, the act of doing good deeds serves two functions when feeling low. Firstly, you get the reward and that reward may be the swift resolution of the issue causing you pain and thus solving the problem. But secondly, there is also a feeling of positivity that comes from doing good deeds and that may not solve the problem you’re facing, but help in how your heart is choosing to process it.

  • To be patient. The imam referenced a hadith in relation to this which is translated to say:

“How wonderful is the case of a believer; there is good for him in everything and this applies only to a believer. If prosperity attends him, he expresses gratitude to Allah and that is good for him; and if adversity befalls him, he endures it patiently and that is better for him”.

  • To seek help from Allah SWT. The imam mentioned the 45th ayat of Sura Baqara which is translated to say:

And seek help through patience and prayer, and indeed, it is difficult except for the humbly submissive [to Allah].

Dear brothers and sisters, as mentioned a couple of weeks ago. We sometimes make the error when faced with tests to try and solve these ourselves to the point where we take Allah SWT out of the equation. It’s like we are saying lets solve it and then we get back to worship and communication to Him.

In actual fact, the tests we face, as well as our blessings, are all reasons to turn to Him first and foremost in prayer, gratitude and submission. To understand this point is the key to overcoming these tests that cause feelings of pain or sorrow.

  • To understand that whatever we are going through is in full accordance with the Divine plan of Allah SWT.

Dear brothers and sisters, sometimes when we are feeling sorrow and pain, it is hard to remember this point. Other times we let emotions get the better of us and begin to wonder if Allah SWT is angry with us.

This is an important point because our tests are not the measure of Allah’s anger. Going through hardships is incorrectly interpreted by some people as meaning that Allah is not pleased with them and that maybe they are being punished.

Dear brothers and sisters, this is an incorrect assumption and the only true measure of whether we are being guided by Allah SWT or whether we are being punished, is the level of our worship and devotion to Him. If that begins to drop or falls to zero then we are being punished and we need to seek His mercy and His forgiveness.

And lastly:

  • To seek counselling from your friends and family.

If we are feeling pain and sorrow, we need to learn to speak out about this with our loved ones. This allows you to get their duas insha’Allah, it relieves some of the pain by sharing it with others and it allows the opportunity to seek advice from others.

However, it is worth mentioning here that nothing beats the counselling achieved in duas with Allah SWT. Seek counsel with Him in prayer and insha’Allah this is the best remedy.

Dear brothers and sisters, life is a test but with hardship comes ease and with this reminder comes practical tips in navigating the ups and downs of this life insha’Allah.

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